Fearless Wonder

Trial run of a fashion update. I'm chronicling my attempts to gain a sense of fashion here rather than trying to present myself as some sort of expert.

Time to give the ole blog a make-over. It realized that the blog was still dressed in all black, like me in middle school. Maybe it was harboring those harsh, self-absorbed, nazel gazing, immature attitudes as well. Time for girly, happy and fresh! In other news... The deadly duo of First Year Teacher/Grad School student tried to chew me up and spit me out yet I have survived and thrived. Still a few more months to go. With a lot of hard work I just might make it. (It helps that I love my students...SOOOOOO cute.) Nothing much to report on the spiritual front. No time to philosophize these days. Becoming a teacher made me realize my happiness relies more on me being engaged and active. Thinking and pondering (read Obsessing) about the meaning of life leads to depression and confusion. Meditation and mindfulness on the other hand are still extremely essential and important. I regret letting them slip from my life the last few semesters. I have been going back to the local med...

On June 15 I got a letter in the mail stating that my name had officially been removed from the membership rolls of the Seventh-Day Adventist church per my request. It was a nice form letter, very respectful of my choice, and I give the church kudos for it. So, just a few short days latter the General Conference of Seventh-Day Adventists rolled into my town, and so did many friends and family members, some from ages past. Of course I had to go to the GC. You don't often get the chance to catch up with so many people from various stages of your life. That part was wonderful. The exhibit hall was wonderful too, with lots of color and sound and pretty display booths, many which were promoting amazing things like health outreach, ministry to the poor (Go ADRA!!) and general "light unto the world" kind of stuff. I went to the first weekend's Sabbath service with a family member who was staying with us. The Sabbath School was fairly uplifting and it reminded us to re...

So I never finished that big post I was working on. It took on a life of it's own and got away from me. In the meantime, here is this thought to ponder... In my education courses we learn that GREAT teachers give their student strategies to help them engage in higher-level thinking, make connections and examine things critically. They help them to learn to be independent and intrinsically motivated. In other words they don't stand at the board lecturing their students for an hour, but rather create an environment where students can learn, explore, question and create. This progressive model of teaching needs to make its way into the church. I find that even in most progressive learning churches the emphasis is still on the song service and a sermon. I've already written about my issues with most modern church music, so let me just focus on the sermon. According to the best teaching pedagogy today, teachers should give a 10-15 minute INTERACTIVE mini-lesson and leave ...

I am still working on a rather long post right now, but in the meantime I think this poem bears reposting. Please Call Me By My True Names by Thich Nhat Hanh Don't say that I will depart tomorrow -- even today I am still arriving. Look deeply: every second I am arriving to be a bud on a Spring branch, to be a tiny bird, with still-fragile wings, learning to sing in my new nest, to be a caterpillar in the heart of a flower, to be a jewel hiding itself in a stone. I still arrive, in order to laugh and to cry, to fear and to hope. The rhythm of my heart is the birth and death of all that is alive. I am the mayfly metamorphosing on the surface of the river. And I am the bird that swoops down to swallow the mayfly. I am the frog swimming happily in the clear water of a pond. And I am the grass-snake that silently feeds itself on the frog. I am the child in Uganda, all skin and bones, my legs as thin as bamboo sticks. And I am the arms merchant, selling deadly weapons to Uganda. I am th...

For many years now I've felt that if I had children I would adopt. I need to finish grad school first and we need to move into a bigger place but if we can manage I think we will adopt. Today I took a look at some websites and ran a search to look at kids. I started tearing up almost immediately. I especially feel sad when I think about the kids that no one will adopt, like older children, minorities, disabled children and sets of siblings. As a teacher I know some the realities that come with raising children. I've been exposed to children with special needs and difficult backgrounds. Although I have many weaknesses as a human being I think this is something I could do. However I also think this is something many more people could do, but they are not willing to open their hearts or take the risk. If I don't end up living up to my ideals in a few years I think it will be a very sad thing. I wish more people would consider adoption. I hear a lot of people say tha...

For the record, still agnostic, but I might be a reverent agnostic. (ala AJ Jacobs) I went to two Easter services (a Saturday night easter vigil and a Sunday morning service.) They were both at Episcopal churches and I have to say, "Episcopals, I like your style." I know all the reasons Adventists reject such ceremony, but I have to say you loose some of the reverence when you take out the ceremony. (and substitute it with cheesy CCM and 70's style sanctuaries.) I've been thinking about joining a church again. I miss that feeling of being part of a larger community with potlucks, families, music (not CCM) all about me. The last "church" we were apart of was full of really good people and some forward thinking pastors, but it was the whole "Jesus is my Boyfriend" music that I couldn't get into. I feel like the old hymns leave room for some unknowing wonder in their lyrics. I've also noticed that a lot of liberal churches have traditional...