Oh where Oh where have you gone?

My husband and I had been tutoring some refugees in English since last November. We had to skip a weekend with them, and the next weekend when we called, they had all moved and were living in separate places. The one who speaks good English hasn't gotten us in touch with the ones we were mainly tutoring, and the lady who set us up with them is trying to find them for us, but has told me it may take some time.

I was hesitant to start tutoring them because of general selfishness, they live so far away, it will take up so much time.. etc, but in the end I really enjoyed being with them and I think they enjoyed us.

We were doing such a small service for them, but for me that were doing a great service. I was wanting something to give to. Despite all my religious questions it was and is clear to me that sharing and loving others is an essential practice. They gave me a place I could live out that practice. And in practicing they became people I loved.

Now that we've disconnected from them I done a few little mitzvahs, but nothing where I am really connecting with people on such a intimate level. The lady who set us up with them says she has another family we could work with, but I want to try and find "our" family first. When we've done homeless feeding with our church I can kind of mentally write off the homeless as "the others" but don't want to be that way. I want to work people who I can know and love. Maybe I need to expand my definition of love. Maybe I need to try harder to connect to those I see as "the others."

Maybe it's more righteous to give, expecting nothing in return, but when I get something back then I want to give more.

Comments

Anonymous said…
At Crossroads, they teach that while "it is more blessed to give than receive," it is still important to be able to receive, and then you are able to give.

"freely as you have received, freely give."
April 29, 2008 at 8:46 PM
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