Adoption
For many years now I've felt that if I had children I would adopt. I need to finish grad school first and we need to move into a bigger place but if we can manage I think we will adopt. Today I took a look at some websites and ran a search to look at kids. I started tearing up almost immediately. I especially feel sad when I think about the kids that no one will adopt, like older children, minorities, disabled children and sets of siblings.
As a teacher I know some the realities that come with raising children. I've been exposed to children with special needs and difficult backgrounds. Although I have many weaknesses as a human being I think this is something I could do. However I also think this is something many more people could do, but they are not willing to open their hearts or take the risk. If I don't end up living up to my ideals in a few years I think it will be a very sad thing.
I wish more people would consider adoption. I hear a lot of people say that they will adopt if they cannot have children of their own, but why only start there? Why not adopt regardless. As far as I know I a not infertile but I still would rather adopt a child who needs a loving home than bring another human being into an overcrowded world.
Of course I am not immune to the charms of babies. I would love to have a baby, but so would everyone else. Babies get adopted easily. It's the older children who are left longing for a home. For me this touches my heart more than the idea of holding my own baby.
I've already written that I feel motherhood is an essentially selfish endeavor and I guess adopting would be selfish for me in some ways. I want a child to take to the zoo, buy cute clothes for, cuddle with and laugh with. However with adoption, as you allow your heart to open to a child, you are filling a need in their life too.
Of course I have many friends with their own children, and I don't disrespect them. In fact I think their kids are terrific and adorable. However, it is easier for me to respect these friends because I know them to be very giving people in other areas of their lives and I know they will teach their children to do the same. I guess I really only disrespect people who live entirely for themselves and their families and don't work to serve the broader community and world.
I would like to push people a little more towards adoption. I've heard a number of people who haven't adopted say, "It takes a special heart." I think this is foolish. I just think it takes a willing heart.
As a teacher I know some the realities that come with raising children. I've been exposed to children with special needs and difficult backgrounds. Although I have many weaknesses as a human being I think this is something I could do. However I also think this is something many more people could do, but they are not willing to open their hearts or take the risk. If I don't end up living up to my ideals in a few years I think it will be a very sad thing.
I wish more people would consider adoption. I hear a lot of people say that they will adopt if they cannot have children of their own, but why only start there? Why not adopt regardless. As far as I know I a not infertile but I still would rather adopt a child who needs a loving home than bring another human being into an overcrowded world.
Of course I am not immune to the charms of babies. I would love to have a baby, but so would everyone else. Babies get adopted easily. It's the older children who are left longing for a home. For me this touches my heart more than the idea of holding my own baby.
I've already written that I feel motherhood is an essentially selfish endeavor and I guess adopting would be selfish for me in some ways. I want a child to take to the zoo, buy cute clothes for, cuddle with and laugh with. However with adoption, as you allow your heart to open to a child, you are filling a need in their life too.
Of course I have many friends with their own children, and I don't disrespect them. In fact I think their kids are terrific and adorable. However, it is easier for me to respect these friends because I know them to be very giving people in other areas of their lives and I know they will teach their children to do the same. I guess I really only disrespect people who live entirely for themselves and their families and don't work to serve the broader community and world.
I would like to push people a little more towards adoption. I've heard a number of people who haven't adopted say, "It takes a special heart." I think this is foolish. I just think it takes a willing heart.
Comments
Having your own child costs insurance copays, the initial cost of cloth diapering, and a midwife (if I stick to my plans of birthing at home). SOOOO much cheaper.
I hate to say that it's a money issue, but it is. If we could afford adoption, I would LOVE to adopt a set of siblings who are older. After my many years going through Pathfinders and then staffing, plus working at a daycare, I've discovered I am better with older children. This would be an ideal situation for me.
You and Will have to pursue whatever you feel led to do. If that's to have a baby, then do that. If you feel led to adopt, then adopt. Whatever people think should be of no concern. :)